Why Dating After Divorce Feel Like High School Days

Divorce may not be a very happy experience, but dating after divorce certainly is. Breaking free of a loveless marriage can give rise to a surge of feelings that may have been suppressed for years together. The joys of such resurfacings has the power to bring back the fountain of youth at any age and any phase of life altogether. The happiest part of it all however, is the feeling of returning to the glorious teens that dating after divorce produces. Here are 5 reasons that aptly justify this fact …

Ruled by happy Cluelessness – Teenage love is all about cluelessness and so is dating after divorce. You have practically no clue about where you are heading, for what and with what consequences, and yet you pursue your chances with a heart brimming with excitement and head full of joyous craze. This is the time when you feel that life has just about dealt more than your fair share of grief and this is the phase when your losses are refunded.

Appetite first – When you have been left wanting for a long time, the first thing you do after breaking free of loveless shackles is to indulge in everything you missed. Be it with respect to physical intimacy or with hitting the hangouts you denied yourself for a long time while in marriage, you are all about satisfying your appetite first! And the best part is, there is no one around you to make you feel bad for being yourself again, mostly because you will not allow it in the first place!

Get closer to not-your-types – You may have been brainwashed into dating the ‘family-types’, the ‘dependable income’ types and the like before; but post divorce is the phase when you don’t usually see yourself getting back to the calculated way of choosing life all over again. To you, this was a mistake you made and will never repeat as long as you are alive. This gives you wings to try getting closer to prospective dates who are ‘not your types’ and get the best of it at the same time.

No place for commitment – A list of legal and moral commitments had dragged you all the way down to the bottom of your life experiences and you will not be foolish enough to bring commitments back to the priority list. You may be committed to your job; you may be committed to your children and pets but not the man who appears next in your life. This could remind you of your high school days when commitment was a ten letter word… too long to spell and too long to include in vocabulary!

It’s all about fun – Dating after marriage is all about having fun, and there is no simpler way to express this feeling. This is the phase of your life when you are ‘you’ again and there are no impediments on your way making you feel smaller or lesser in the legal books of commitments. You feel young and beautiful again which gives you all the necessary boost to pursue your life full of fun once again.

4 Undeniable Reasons Why Some Women Lose Chances At Finding Love

Most women are the happiest when in love and ecstatic when loved in return. However, there is a certain section of the not-so-fortunate ladies who seem to find themselves in a never ending quest for love which eludes them time and time again. It all happens till the ladies question in their minds, what exactly is going wrong that they are always found grappling a vicious circle of loveless existence. More often than not, the answer stares straight at the face. Recognizing it is all that matters. Here are 4 reasons why some women lose their chances at finding love no matter how hard they try…

Reeking of desperation – Trying too hard is perhaps the most potent reason that keeps brushing love away. Reeking of desperation is never a charming parameter when it comes to finding love. The typically ‘love me’ attitude usually leads to generating pity than love. When ladies are faced with such emotions, it is best to let it wade before re embarking on the quest. Talking it out with friends and staying engaged with some constructive activity is sure to help shed the desperation mode.

Idolizing the past – Dwelling in the past can allow the brain to set parameters to judge new opportunities. So, when ladies eventually meet a love prospect, she will immediately start assessing the same in terms of her past experiences. This is one of those moments when the ills of the ex are forgotten and his good sides seem to surge to the forefront. From comparing looks to comparing profession; from comparing ideas to taste palette, just about everything in the new prospect seems dull compared to the ex. The sole solution is to stop, wake up and smell the coffee!

Seeing the present with doubt and dissent – For ladies who have gone through 2 or more breakups, accepting the fact that unconditional love can actually find its way home can be a little too much to believe. This is where the prospect that appears next in life will be viewed with doubts and suspicion till the time the former will wash his hands off and walk the other way. it is necessary to accept the truth that all that humans can do is take a chance and hope for the best. For all you know, the 5th guy you meet could give you 50 glorious years of happiness.

Giving it all in the name of love – This is mostly a trait with ladies who have loved and lost many times over to an extent that they don’t want anything to go wrong this time. This is also the group that tends to latently blame themselves for the breakups and associated experiences. A sort of forced effort is seen in the part of these ladies to try and take the burden of maintaining the relationship solely on their shoulders giving the other party a free end to do as and what he pleases as long as he comes home for dinner.

Giving it all in the name of love exemplifies the absence of this divine feeling in relationships. So it is never a good idea to approach love with an entirely misplaced guilty conscience.

5 Qualities Men Don’t Realize They Need In Their Women

If you hit out to the streets right now and ask any random man the top qualities he wants the woman of his dreams to possess, he is sure to start with aspects like shape, size, the number of out-of-the-world moves they know in bed, their sense of dressing so on and so forth. While this can leave a number of women across the world thoroughly disheartened, the following revelation is sure to bring hope back into this otherwise superficial perception of the fairer gender.

As many may have noticed, most men, who may even be dating underwear models (or the like) tend to distance themselves from the relationship feeling incomplete even after thoroughly fulfilling bedroom adventures. The truth is, this is the century when most men don’t realize that the qualities they actually need in a woman lies elsewhere. Here are 5 qualities that men usually don’t realize they need in their women…

Compassion – Sympathy, empathy, love and compassion complete a woman, makes her more approachable, respectable and lovable. Be it towards friends or family, colleagues at work or even stray animals, compassion is one of those godly qualities that make a man restore faith in the fact that his chosen woman is in all possibility, his ‘better half’.

Commitment – While it is true that it is the men folk who usually cower at the word commitment, a greater section of the human male population expect their women to be commitment ready and not phobic. Whether you like it or not, it gives them a sort of uplifting assurance about their self worth.

Self dependence – Most men like the idea of being the Knight in shining armor for the women they love. However, when it comes to everyday life, extending a shoulder all the time for every little thing can get a little burdensome. Be it emotional and / or financial, men folk of the 21st century expect their women to be capable of handling everyday issues without weeping, whining or complaining about the same.

Benevolence and Forgiveness – This is yet another Godly quality that men don’t realize they need in their women, especially those looking forward to a long and happy relationship. In very simple words, most enlightened men of the 21st century would reel at the thought of having to spend the rest of their lives with women who keep a count of every slip and every little error made by the former through the course of the relationship. What is even worse is being exposed to being fined for the mini crimes at every given opportunity.

Basically, there is more to a woman than being an unrelenting old bat who is not open enough to forgive and benevolent enough to stop making her man pay over and over again for that one single folly committed sometime eons ago.

Funny – More often than not, this is a quality that most women would expect in their man of dreams. However, it is also the other way round. Men breathe free with women who know how to make jokes and take jokes. This may be because deep down inside, men do realize that while shapes and sizes of bodies are sure to change over time; what may never change is the quality of his lady love to bring a smile on his face through every phase of his life.

4 Reasons Why Your Man Is Emotionally Unavailable To You

It is true that most women are a more emotionally dependent than most men inhabiting the planet. But, to misread this fact as men are usually emotionally unavailable and label it as ‘normal’ would be completely wrong. In most happy and lasting relationships, both involved individuals are available to each other emotionally and that too willfully. If your man however, has been distant from your needs and refuses to agree to it, here are 4 reasons that can account for his emotional absence…

He has tuned himself out of the relationship – More often than not, men who find their relationships even slightly burdening, tend to tune out of it than discuss it. This is the phase when they also tune themselves out of the emotional needs of their partners mostly because they find it annoying and weighing down on them. As a response to mental distancing, he also becomes completely emotionally unavailable, mostly because from the bottom of his heart, he no longer values or wishes to continue this relationship.

A Solution to Consider Try and talk it out with your partner than enacting emotional dramas and blaming him for a list of follies you have chalked out.

He is emotionally needy himself – If your shoulders are not strong, you cannot lend it to others to cry on… if a man is emotionally needy himself, there is very little hope for him to cater to your emotional needs first. His emotional absence in this respect does not necessarily mean that he is out of love with you or is blind to your needs. Basically, he just needs to settle his turbulence before he can settle yours.

A Solution to Consider – The worries of the world are not laden on your shoulders only. Please ensure being as much emotionally available to your man before you expect him to reciprocate.

Are you being unnecessarily clingy? Issues can be addressed, but non-issues are best left alone to sort themselves out. It is not very unusual for women to be unnecessarily clingy at times expecting a kind of response which their partners cannot generate. Such surreal expectations when not catered to may lead to the generation of a bitter feeling that the latter are acting pricey and not being emotionally available when they should be.

A Solution to Consider – Please be reasonable and rational at all times even while experiencing a surge of emotional upheaval. There is a reason why head has been places above the heart… use your conscious judgement to ascertain if you are being unnecessarily clingy.

He has his attention vested elsewhere – This is a very harsh truth that many women have had to deal with. It is also a proven fact that men stray more easily from relationships than women for a host of justified or unjustified reasons. If your man has been emotionally unavailable to you for a while and you can see a distinct difference in his gestures and behaviors, there is a strong possibility that his interests are vested elsewhere.

A Solution to Consider – 99% men will never agree to having another relationship. However, talking it out is the best solution. If he has been cheating on you, you must know that you deserve better.

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